Embarrassing Golf Moments - Captain Golf

I was recently asked to list my most embarrassing golf moments....my reply with a cheeky smile: ''how long have you got?''

Golfing Nightmares 

We have all been there. Don't deny it, we have all played a shocker.

Captain Golf's Embarrassing Golf Moments

1. Hit a Tree and went Backwards....2017

I once struck a tree with my shot, the tree was only ten metres away, the ball went backwards circa 100 metres landing near the 4 ball before. Sometimes you got to go backwards to go forwards!

2. Hit a Scoreboard whilst it was being Constructed (ding dang dong) and the 70 year old Caddie then choked on their boiled sweet in shock. 

Pre Royal Birkdale The Open, as I was approaching one of the greens, it was probably 180 yards away. I was tempted to lay-up and play safety. 

To the right of my eye and the green, the course staff were constructing a score board for the next Open tournament.

Captain Golf: 'I think I should lay- up, what do you think?' (asking the caddie)

Caddie: ' Alright son, I think just get it on the green, here you go use this club'

Captain Golf: ' Are you sure about the Hybrid, not the 4 Iron or go short with a 7 Iron'.

Caddie: ' Dont worry, just give it a good wack and we will be on the dance floor'.

30 Seconds later........the ball goes more to the right than expected, straight for the scoreboard construction team and their nearby transit van.

Captain Golf: ' FOUR.....FOUR.....FOUR.....FOUR......'

Caddie: 'Pal, Pal, help me' as he starts choking on a boiled sweet.

Scoreboard construction workers all dive for cover. 

*****(Ding Dang Dong Ding******* 

Thankfully everyone was ok.

The ball landed to the right of the green and no- one was injured.

Captain Golf: after patting the caddie on the back to dislodge the boiled sweat: ' blimey that was a close call are you ok?'

Caddie: 'Yes pal no problem, thought I was a gonna then'.

3. On the 18th at Royal Birkdale, 180 yard approach shot to the green in front of the 19th hole beer garden. 

Having somewhat recovered from the earlier close call, we approached the end of the round. A magnificent golf course Royal Birkdale.

Towards the end of the 18th, the huge grandstand towered over the fairway, close to the approach/green and also main clubhouse/beer garden.

Captain Golf: 'Ok, we should probably play it safe here, 7 Iron ok?' (asking the caddie)

Caddie: 'Look no problem, use this again' (hands the hybrid to Captain Golf).

Captain Golf: 'Are you sure?'/

Caddie: 'Yes'.

*****(Ding Dang Dong Ding******* 

The balls goes into the empty grandstand, striking the metallic structure, bouncing and then falling out of the grandstand onto the rough next to the fairway reasonably close to the green.

I had to do the walk of shame, no denying it, that was my shot and that was my result. In the glaze of the beer drinkers on the 19th hole, I then chipped the ball onto the 18th green and putted to finish the round. 

Thanking the caddie, a few grins from those onlookers at the 19th and cheeky cold pint later, it was a good round. The good, the bad, the ugly.

4. Passing Through a Four Ball 2019

Pre lads golf tour in Scotland I decided to get a round of golf in to practice for the big tournament. Having already been to the driving range in Edinburgh, my new 3 wood was 'on song'. It was important to get Links golf practice in so I headed to Kilspindie.

However......playing as a one ball on a congested golf course (that day) I caught up with a four ball who waved me through.

Having played the round really well up until this point, somehow, the ball was duffed 3-4 times in full sight of the four ball. I had barely got past them (they were slightly further ahead 100 metres or so). 

On this occasion, I picked up the ball, thanked the chaps and walked onto the next hole.....nightmare.

These things do happen but in part help make Golf such a great game.

What were your most embarrassing golf moments? You are welcome to share.

Thanks for reading and keep a look out for the next blog entry.

Take good care.

Captain Golf

www.captaingolf.golf

www.captaingolf.blogspot.com

Bad Rib + Golf Swing= Golf Not Possible

No Pain No Gain

Good day ladies and gents. A fine day it has been, in the words of Finley Quay, the sun is shinning the weather is sweet 'oh yeh'.

I am afraid there is no zen golf entry this week, the link which was to be used has disappeared into the abyss. We must therefore reflect and move on, Amen brother.

So..what has happened over the last week?
Captain golf injured his ribs on Monday. No I was not injured on the course and taken to A&E in a golf buggy, instead, having achieved success at the driving range, I played 5 aside football in the evening and took a wack to the upper rib cage, a golfer's nightmare. As a consequence, the golf lesson today was postponed. This was to be lesson 6 out of a new batch of lessons. Coach was to improve my short game on the course. Alas, friends I hope to be back in action in a week or so, ie on the course and driving range. Did we win the futebol? No, we lost and in fact got relegated (on goal difference, by one goal)....not a good day at the office.

Managed to get the rib checked over in the 'walk in' A & E but appears to be badly strained. Very impressive, only a 45 minute wait, hats off to the NHS, there has been improvement.

Bytheby, 'No Hard Hats Needed-lesson Five' is on the way soon. www.captaingolf.blogspot.com will also be including more photos/comical links in future versions...so stay tuned folks...

Next Blog Entry

The next blog entry will take a quick look at golf and the environment. Can golf be good for the environment? We will see.

Regards

captaingolf

No Hard Hats Needed- Lesson Four

No Hard Hats Needed- Golf Lesson Four

Quite a lesson. Lesson four out of five. The coach issued a new swing which would take approx two months to implement. So drumroll, in two months we will review this golfing lesson and see the results.

What did the swing involve? Well I can conclude that it did not involve anything you would see on Strictly Come Dancing. The swing involved a twist of hips but no 'cha cha cha'.
Having twisted slightly, I leaned to my left (allowing the hip to twist but stay in line) and kept the baseball cap to the right of the ball. On swinging the club, I was informed it should not go horizontal (i.e. not like the legend John Daly) but stop mid air, with a straight left arm.

So how are these mechanics translated into practice? Well with difficulty, with so many mental 'checks', you might forget that you need to hit the ball. Alas, tricks of the trade include using a long mirror often located at a driving range and found in the teaching area. You should get some electrical tape and place two lines on the mirror.
Yes folk may assume you are a wee bit weird, but it should help. Why use the mirror and electrical tape? You need to ensure that the head and hip do not move beyond the parallel lines. When using the technology/video system to analyse the mechanics, all the pros maintain a movement within a 'certain' range. When your movement (i.e. a beginner like myself) breaches the given parameters/range, it will result in a duff shot.

Did it make any difference? 'Yes' and 'no' is the answer. Some horrific shots but one or two good ones. Coach advised that Faldo when training was not allowed to hit a golf ball for 6 weeks….the drill was to simply practice the swing/movement. So practice is needed.

A couple of days later I made another outing to the driving range.
This was a good decision. Things seemed to click. I managed to hit around 30 balls using this technique, with no duff shots. Although still difficult when moving between the driver and the irons to maintain the consistency.

Key Criteria Learnt From Golf Lesson Four:

-Practice the mechanics, stance and swing.
-Be patient and refrain from hitting a 1000 balls until you are confident you have the right 'swing'.
-Practice, Practice Practice.
-Use a long mirror if possible.

The Poll Results
Does the brand of your golf club make you a better player?
The results were 'even stevens'. 33% reported 'yes', 50% reported 'no' and 16% were 'unsure'.

I would strongly recommend you read the comment by Mike regarding the blog entry: 'do golf brands really matter?'

He raised some excellent points, and a good comparison with playing a basic guitar (to learn the basics) before then moving on to better kit. Anyhow, have a quick look and please do add any further comments. It was an interesting blog entry and we will return to this topic in future editions.

The next poll will ask the question:

Does a 'water' feature such as a lake or river have an adverse effect on a player's score?

Next Blog….

The next blog entry will look at 'golf photography' and the 'Zen' of the golf course.....

If you have enjoyed reading captaingolf, bookmark the page and spread the word. You can also contact captaingolf at cgcaptaingolf@gmail.com.

The National Golf Course + Oak Tree

Practice Practice Practice

Sunday was another chance to put the coaches' words of wisdom into action. This was a three person outing at a National golf course in the UK. Unfortunately there was no time to practice at the driving range, there was an opportunity to tee off earlier ahead of two games of four pairs. Just as well, otherwise it would have been a long day.


Teeing off with the 'gatekeeper' watching, time seemed to stand still. I used the driver but sliced the ball wide, to the right of the fairway and into the woodland. It wasn't a great start. The conditions were changeable, initially we experienced snow, then sleet, rain and lastly sun. I had opted for a cheeky yellow ball in case the Gods were to let rip.

As I took my stance in the woodland, there was a beast…..of an oak tree, its trunk wide in diameter, towering over my position (although five metres away). Sods law, the wall would strike this imposing monster/menace…and it did.

An almighty ping, followed by a 'doing' and the ball rebounded off the tree and ended about twenty foot behind my original position. Still relatively close to the tee, the two four ball pairs had arrived on the horizon and no doubt witnessed this battle against the tree.

The form did improve. When the technique worked it worked well. Playing off a 28, I managed a score of 17…not fantastic but an improvement from the 9 the previous outing.


Things that threw me were striking the ball on an uneven surface….this shot was not in my golfing vocabulary. I was yet to reach that golfing level or gain that skill, as one might experience in a computer game. Other gremlins continued to haunt, including the PW and SW. My short game was well either 'long' (i.e. 'over hit', chipped beyond the green) or 'very short' (i.e. the ball went nowhere). One might conclude that my short game was non-existent. Again…I had focused so much time on the long play, I simply did not have the right technique/follow through with the PW and SW. It was frustrating. Conquer those clubs and the handicap may well fall.

Another improvement had been the lack of balls lost. It was on the 17th hole I realised this fact…..and then 'plonk' one went into the lake, further up on the same hole, there was another 'plonk', the ball landed in more water.
Moral of the story is don't tempt fate.

In a nut shell, Sunday included a lot of psychology. I was defeated by frustration. We finished the course on the 19th hole with a well earn't pint.

Next Blog Entry
The next Blog entry will be look at a comical clip of that legend John Daly in action on the course...

If you have not already done so…..check the poll on the right. Does the brand of golf club really make a difference?

You can contact captain golf at cgcaptaingolf@gmail.com , any ideas/suggestions drop me a line.

If you have enjoyed reading www.captaingolf.blogspot.com spread the word...

See you soon

Say Cheese

Lights Camera Action

Ok ladies and gents. I managed to create the first captaingolf video for www.captaingolf.blogspot.com Yes folk were requesting a video or two. See what you think and let me know if it gets the thumbs up or thumbs down?



You can still see an awkward movement/stance in the swing, yet this coach assures me will disappear once I crack the swing and keep the head still. Potential to add few more videos if this one proves successful. The stance was a lot worse prior to this. Hopefully it has improved since.

The Poll
Meanwhile, following on from the blog about golf brands, make sure you register your vote on the matter. Locate the poll on the right hand side.


The Next Blog Entry:
The next blog entry will look at lessons learn't from lesson 3 as promised in the previous blog.

The Golfing Journey: The Beginning

1.00 Topic: Introduction
Welcome to my golfing blog, I hope it finds you well. The aim of this blog is
i) Document my journey from being a complete novice (i.e. pro at hitting air) to an average ‘half-decent’ player (although currently unsure whether it can be achieved or not).
ii) Give hope to other beginners.
iii) Talk about golf in general, equipment/share tips/gain further knowledge and host some cheeky polls if time permits.
iv) Hear your comments/thoughts.

I hope to update this blog as and when there have been any developments on my golfing journey.

2.00 Topic: Journey to date.
The Bug
Right, well I have the golfing bug, it is a fantastic bug and a great sport. If you are yet to discover the bug, give it a bash and then give it another attempt. A doctor is likely diagnose the ‘bug’ as having a ‘want’ or ‘need’ to play golf whenever possible.

For me the initial key was to go through ‘pain’ barrier, from not being able to hit a ball, to then one day ping the ball a fair distance (albeit not consistently). Once you get that great shot from an iron/hear the ping from the driver and you see the ball land in the distance, you have graduated from kindergarden on the golfing journey.

Background
How did I fall into this great sport? I hear you groan, however, you are still reading which is a good thing. Let me continue:

In 2009 I was given the daunting task of playing at Glen Eagles in Scotland on a ’stag do’. This was truly a baptism of fire. I had had no golfing lessons prior or extensive experience. In preparation, I on average visited the nearby golf range using my fathers old clubs two/three times a week before the baptism. Hitting around 100 balls for £5 there was improvement, but the source for my technique was largely youtube videos or reading various books. Having gained the ability to hit the ball (more times than hitting air) I took on one of the homes of Golf.

Now for any beginner, the first tee can be daunting, but at Glen Eagles there was perhaps a little more pressure. 18 potential monsters, of which you hope to tame. It doesn’t help if there is an audience watching. I had decided to stick to the five iron which soon became a good buddy of mine, although we would fall out more or less on every hole. Having watched my golfing partner slice the ball a couple of feet, some pressure was lifted. I stepped up, tried to remember my technique, swung, ‘clump’. A foot of turf was sent into the air, it travelled around five meters and the ball did not fare much better. Yes this was embarrassing, yet luckily the man in the hut (who’s role is to check that green fees have been paid) had been looking in the opposite direction. A quick fetch of the divot and I managed to replace the tear (followed by a gulp and a determination to proceed).

In a nutshell, it was a tough course, but an honour to play. The God’s decided to rain, torrential at times, the wind howled but it was manageable. I left a club in the rough and on another occasion it was so wet I lost grip on another club and it went further than the ball. However, despite the baptism of Fire I can conclude that yes there were a number of 8’s/rings but drum roll I did manage two level pars. It was the two level pars that gave me the encouragement to continue, I had the potential to hit good shots.

3.00 Lessons
Well ladies and gentlemen. Drum roll, I finally did the deed and enrolled for golf lessons. Now, to all beginners I strongly strongly recommend lessons from a PGA Coach. To date I have only had one lesson and unsurprisingly it was the best golfing lesson to date. The lesson involved lights, camera and action i.e. technology.

Using a computer program and camcorder, you can create a profile which shows your swing, posture/grip and compares it to leading golfers such as Mr Ernie Els.
Quite a revelation looking at one’s posture. I was hunched, had bad posture, poor grip and well it looked a mess (some may have called security). The PGA chap, gave me a new grip and stance. Comparing the old stance vs the new stance on video was a comical experience. Prior to the lesson, I did not look like a golfer, a transformation was needed.

Now, the plan was to put this new knowledge into practice at the next 18 hole outing. Yes it was part-successful, some sweet shots but again, more often than not, I would miss the ball or hit air. This proved to be very frustrating, two/three good shots with the five iron and then a scuff/miss. I contemplated taking a boxing bag on a separate golfing trolley, but the key was to keep a level head. Despite such frustrations, I persevered with the driver. To date, I had avoided the driver as my consistency had been far worse than the irons. Yet a driver is certainly crucial to playing 4/5 par holes. For every one strike from the 5 iron, my golfing companions had gone double the distance. For the last 9 holes, I used the driver, it worked and the ball went 200 yards. Perhaps with more lessons/a better swing it could go further, time will tell. The moral of the story is, a driver can save you shots, as long as you have accuracy. I will go into the short game in another blog entry.

Key Things Learnt from Lesson 1:
-Get lessons and then book some more.
-Ensure you have the right grip.
-Keep the left arm straight as you hold the club.
-Ensure your head is to the right of the ball (the straight left arm should cause your shoulders to dip slightly like a seesaw with a weight on one side).
-Knees should be slightly flexed.
-Your back should be straight, not hunched and the bum out slightly.
-Concentrate on the ball.
-I strongly recommend the video profiling.

Right, I will update once the second lesson has been conquered. Key areas I need to develop are a) adopt a good swing maintaining a good stance- b) improve with the SW and PW…they are gremlins at present.

Any other beginners out there or wise comments would be appreciated.